Alone Again

It's a familiar refrain: wrong place, wrong time, wrong guy, wrong girl. Without going into specifics that no one besides the principals need to know, I'll just say here that MacKenna and I are no longer together as a couple. Pretty much, I'm the nut low for any girl that wants to get married/have children in the next couple of years. I got started dating later than most and therefore I'm behind the times and haven't had the experiences that a lot of my peers have had.

Not only that, but my life in general has been in a stall for almost 10 years. I'm ready for that to change, but I have such a hard time getting started down a path if it involves having to close doors to other avenues. All that being said, I just don't want to drag someone else into my quagmire of a life permanently until I am ready and equipped to provide happiness for them. I need time to get to that point, and time is the one thing we really didn't have.

I'm pretty torn up about the whole thing, so if you see me on AIM or in person somewhere, give me a pat on the back. I can say with utmost certainty that this could have been the right girl for me, but a multitude of conflicting philosophies on how to handle the next couple of years coupled with the complete lack of quality time we could give each other (working opposite shifts is pretty terrible) led to the demise of our relationship. I blame myself.

Songs of the second:
Ludo - Hum Along (t5 all time song)
The Streets - On the Edge of a Cliff (keeps me going)
The Hold Steady - Lord, I'm Discouraged
Death Cab for Cutie - Someday You Will Be Loved